Not all are the same. There are three ways how people perceive things. Some people are visual and are influence most by sight. Others are auditory and motivated by what they hear. You will also find people who are influenced most by what they feel and they are categorized as kinesthetic. It's true that all people operates in all types but it is evident that one mode is dominant.
Now talking about love, different people expresses their love based on their personalities and also desire to receive love in different ways as well.
The visual man loves to give his wife beautiful clothes. He wants to see his wife beautiful. A visual woman always want to see his husband and arranges her home to look clean and nice. An auditory woman loves to hear sweet words from her husband. When making love, an auditory man set a romantic music for background. Holding the hands of his wife while walking is the game of a kinesthetic man while a kinesthetic woman needs to be hug and touch continually by her man. Different people wants to be cherished differently.
King Solomon and his Shunamite wife demonstrated these three modes of perception. "Let me see your face...for..your face is lovely." Expressing in auditory way Solomon appeals, "Let me hear your voice; for your voice is sweet" (Song of Solomon 2:14, New King James Version).
His Shunamite bride is kinesthetic so she enjoys her husband caress. "His left arm is under my head, and his right arm embraces me" (Song of Solomon 2:6).
If your wife or girlfriend is different from you and you expect her to behave like you do, you will have troubles continually. Say for example, a visual wife and a kinesthetic husband. Returning from home very tired, the husband grabs his wife and kiss him but his wife is not responsive and this makes him irritated. His wife is contented of just seeing his husband.
The husband throws down his coat, kick off his shoes and make himself comfortable in the sofa. His wife make efforts to clean and arrange their home and seeing her husband unmindful of his housekeeping makes her frantic. They have another bad encounter.
In bed, the husband hug his wife. Sex or no sex, he just want to embrace her. The wife just contented of his presence, move to the other side of the bed. The third war begins!
What is the solution to such problem of two people in love with each other but are different from the other that are always in conflict?
First, identify your partner. Is she visual, auditory, kinesthelic? How can we know that? By listening to how they talk. A visual people will say, "I see it." "I hear you," auditory person tend to say. "I feel we should do that," Kinesthetic people often say. More importantly, action is better that words. Observing how your partner reacts and behave is the key to identification.
Second, accept your mate difference. The natural response is to reject that difference and try to change their partner. Often, failure is the result to such attempts. Don't forget to respect individuality because it is a gift from God (Psalm 139:16). Don't use force but instead work with the flow.
God reveals His love in different ways to different people. When healing the crippled from birth, Peter said, "Look at us!" (Acts 3:4) - visual. Jesus said to a man with a withered hand, "Stretch out your hand" ( Matthew 12:13), there was love in His voice - auditory. The blind man was healed by Jesus touch (John 9:6) - kinesthetic. If God ministered in different ways, we must do likewise.
Third, live an agape life. The highest form of love is agape in Greek. This love is a self-sacrificing love, a perfect love demonstrated by God toward us.
Love your spouse more than yourself. Our relationship in the home would be better if we apply this agape principle of love. "We then who are strong ought to bear with the scruples of the weak and not to please ourselves. Let each of us please his neighbor...for even Christ did not please Himself." (Romans 15:1-3)
In the light of agape, the kinesthetic husband will keep his shoes in proper place sometimes and the wife must accept his husband cuddling sometimes. The two self becomes one!
Christian Single? Please visit this great site for
Christian Dating.
Read More Click here
No comments:
Post a Comment